Published: October 11, 2008 04:16 pm            

Life’s Like That - October 12, 2008

So, what kind of day is today going to be for you?

Edward R. Morrow used to start his broadcast with, “What sort of day was it? It was a day like every other day, filled with those events that alter and illumine history.” Well, I don't think he was thinking about Oct. 12, 2008. The best this Sunday could do was to be named Farmer's Day. Not that I have anything against farmers. I think farmers and ranchers are great folk. I like the story about the city ladies' visit to a farm.

The Monday Afternoon Club, an organization of wealthy city women, met and decided that this month's outing was to be at a dairy farm. Most of them had lived in the city all their lives, and had never seen such a thing.

The day came, and the ladies filed into the rented bus, which whisked them off to their destination. On the way, they watched out the windows as the city squalor turned into lovely, unpolluted countryside.

After they arrived, the farmer who invited them to look him up should they have any questions greeted them. Myrtle, after looking about and being amazed by what she saw, stepped into a building and viewed something she thought was quite remarkable. She saw the farmer walk by and hailed him – he sauntered in.

“Sir,” she inquired, “why doesn't this cow have any horns?” The farmer cocked his head for a moment and then began in a patient tone: “Well, ma'am, cattle can do a powerful lot of damage with horns. Sometimes we keep' em trimmed down with a hacksaw. Other times we can fix up the young 'uns by puttin' a couple drops of acid where their horns would grow in, and that stops 'em cold. Still, there are some breeds of cattle that never grow horns. But the reason this cow don't have no horns, ma'am, is 'cause it's a horse.”

That is when you say, “Oh” and wish you hadn't asked. I can think of a number of times in my life I have asked questions that would have gotten me a “stupid sign” from the Blue Collar Comedy Team. A while back we had tickets to a show in Georgetown. We were standing inside the building waiting for the doors to open when the man next to me said, “Did ya come to see the show?” I even tried to give directions to the Captain of the Nova Scotian Schooner Blue Nose II how to get to the Atlantic Ocean from his berth on the Elizabeth River in Norfolk. But, that is a long story.

Everyone makes mistakes. The memory of some of these gaffes will linger on for many years, even a lifetime. They call it experience, and experience is the best teacher. So, if Farmer's Day is your thing, congratulations and to all a happy and prosperous Farmer's Day. Have a good and godly day. As the man says on BBN, “For of what value is a good day if it is not also a godly day?”



Jerry Bullock has written his weekly column for the Daily Record for more than 20 years. Jerry is a retired Air Force colonel, an ordained Baptist minister, professional counselor, military historian, speaker, and writer. He is a native Texan tracing his Texas roots to the days of the Republic.

        

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