Living the Vibe

On the wall of the Women’s House of The Vibe Sober Living Complex, Stephanie Ramirez-Pelletier has painted the phrase, “One day at a time” in bold, red letters.

The mantra serves as a reminder to those who will live at The Vibe that they are in the middle of the process of recovery, a journey that they won’t undertake alone.

“The hardest part about being sober is the isolation,” Ramirez-Pelletier said. “Those first few years are really, really hard.”

As the founder of Vibe Sober Living, Ramirez-Pelletier — now seven years sober — draws inspiration from her own journey and experiences with a loved one who is also on their own arduous path to recovery.

Earlier this year, one of Ramirez-Pelletier’s children suffered a fentanyl-related stroke. Ramirez-Pelletier already dedicated one of the apartments in the complex to her child for when they got sober, but when the reality settled in that this would not be the case, Ramirez-Pelletier enlisted the help of a friend and a Dialectical Behavioral Therapy program to help reset her course.

It was during this healing process that Ramirez-Pelletier realized the next step in her path.

“I’m going to go with what I wanted to do for her on a bigger scale,” Ramirez-Pelletier said. “Even in the crux of my worst heartache, I still want to help others. I still want other people to see that you can stay sober through the worst. You can maintain a good course, even when things are falling apart all the way around you.”

With this fire kindled within her, Ramirez-Pelletier began The Vibe: a safe, supportive, judgment-free sober living apartment complex in San Marcos, one dedicated to building a community for those who are on their individual paths to healing.

“I can’t mentor anybody because I’m going through my own loss,” Ramirez-Pelletier said, “but I can help people not relapse. It’s calculations. It’s all data. It’s all provable data. If you’re doing X, Y and Z, then you’re not going to relapse. Those things are different for everyone. You find what works for you and you stick to that like glue.”

The Vibe is all about helping people find whatever those factors are that will work for them while surrounding themselves with supportive people who are also working through the steps to recovery.

“No one is born an addict,” Ramirez-Pelletier said. “You’re born into trauma. You only become an addict because you have unaddressed mental health or unaddressed mental trauma, one of the two.”

The Vibe’s approach to recovery incorporates connectedness to each other and activity to help maintain sobriety. The complex offers a variety of activities and resources such as yoga, meditation and support groups to help tenants stay on the path to a healthy lifestyle.

“I realized we needed a graduation step for people to go when they leave (traditional) sober living, where there’s still drug tests but everybody has their own plan,” Ramirez-Pelletier said. “We’re hoping to set a whole new precedent. Every single person will have a lease. That way people who live there can build an actual rental history in a place that isn’t labeled as sober living, because the stigma around this disease is just so huge.”

Ramirez-Pelletier has been hard at work expanding the complex to include LGBTQ-friendly spaces, as well as preparing for The Vibe’s official grand opening, set for noon on Thursday, July 20.

“I do believe so much in what we’re already doing,” Ramirez-Pelletier said. “Once you get to the seven-year mark, (recovery) is so different. You’re literally a new person physically. If we can get people from the one- to seven-year mark, they can go out into the world and live some very normal lives.”

The Vibe is there to help them achieve that reality by helping residents live one day at a time.

“Even in the crux of my worst heartache, I still want to help others. I still want other people to see that you can stay sober through the worst.”

— Stephanie Ramirez-Pelletier, The Vibe Sober Living