“It’s the most wonderful time of the year.” However, for many of us, the holidays are the hardest part of the year. We suffer with loneliness, isolation, depression and grief. Some of us may have lost very close family members, lost a marriage, or lost a job. These losses can lead to extreme loneliness. With such excessive loneliness, we tend to isolate. We avoid holiday parties and making friends. If we make friends, we are scared that we would lose them just like we lost our family members.
The holiday season magnifies these feelings which causes us to feel more alone and isolated. At these parties we are forced to put up a face that says, “I’m happy! Yea for the holidays,” even when we are truly not happy. Sometimes, when I am at a party surrounded by people, I still feel lonely. It’s so hard to put on a happy face when you are feeling so lonely and depressed. Additionally, trying to act happy when you are really suffering doesn’t work. I’ve done this at a couple of parties and it made me feel more lonely and depressed.
Many of us have dealt with trauma in our past, and the holidays trigger us to relive the trauma. My mom past away very unexpectedly. I wonder if she knew how much I loved her? I keep waiting to see her walk through the door, or answer the phone when I call. But, these will never happen again. My grief is really magnified by the holidays. They definitely make me feel like I am reliving this trauma. So, I really know what it feels like to be lonely during the holidays.
