DEAR ABBY: I have a colleague who has become an amazing friend over the last few years. We plan dinner dates or work conferences periodically, and we also try to book spa appointments together when we have vacation time.
“Sandy” is everything a person would want in a friend. However, when we go out to eat, she usually insists on paying for my meal. She has also prepaid some of my spa appointments. When this pattern first started, I was a little put off, but I appreciated her generosity – maybe a little selfishly – because it saved me money. But now I feel constantly indebted to her because I can never seem to return the favor.
When I insist on paying for myself, we argue and bicker. Sandy says she wants to show her appreciation for my partnership at work. She also explains that I have children (who are assumedly expensive) whereas she is childless.
