OP / ED
When someone we admire is accused of abuse, it can be hard to accept. Instead of considering the survivor(s), people often defend the person they like over the people that were hurt.
WHY DOES THIS HAPPEN?
When anyone receives consistent positive attention from media or in community, we’re encouraged to assume they’re good people in every way. When we’re taught the things we like, believe in, or are connected to are part of our identity, it’s harder to change how we think or feel about those people, beliefs, or things. When we’re told someone we admire has caused sexual violence towards others; it can change how we see our lives, relationships, and even ourselves – making it easier to blame rather than believe survivors seeking support.
Awareness of these problematic dynamics in our society doesn’t fix them. Critical thinking, self-reflection, and centering care are necessary for responding appropriately to outcries of abuse.
WHAT CAN WE DO ABOUT IT?
Remember that many things can be true at the same time. Someone could be an incredible nurse, saving multiple lives each day, and at home pressure their partner to have sex. Believing someone can do no wrong or shouldn’t experience consequences for their actions hurts us all. Facing the truth of sexual violence, that anyone can choose to harm someone else, can be painful and scary. However, ignoring sexual violence just leads to more harm.
It’s not about having to cancel celebrities or end admiration. It’s about staying open to the truth, supporting accountability, empowering survivors, and creating safe communities together.
