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You may remember a few weeks back I mentioned reading an article in "Chicken Soup for the Soul" about recycling which I enjoyed. I imagined it to be true in many households as not all members believe in recycling to the same degree. I requested permission from the people behind it to use it in this column and just recently received it. So here it is:
Recycling Monster
"'I love being married. It’s so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life,'" Rita Rudner wrote.
"Just yesterday I was reminiscing about the good old days. I was remembering how easy and simple life used to be for me and my family. But that was before...Before...Recycling. Before...When there were no detailed and lengthy rules and discussions about trash; you just took it out and threw everything in the garbage cans. And all garbage cans looked alike; they were all kind of gray and dented. And, most of the time, the lids didn’t really fit. So what changed? Our family resolved to go green and recycle. That challenge turned into the invasion of the Recycling Monster.
"Recycling Monster was very cunning and smart. He didn’t just come in the front door and plop himself down on the couch. He crept in little by little. And he looked a lot like my husband, Frank. He was gentle and kind and suggested that we, as a family, needed to start a recycling program at home. Our city was initiating its own plan and would help residents wanting to participate in the program by delivering color-coded trash cans — green for garden clippings, blue for paper, plastic and glass, and brown for good old regular trash. How nice. The cans were free, prettier than our old ugly gray cans, and all of the lids fit. So our 'going green' adventures began.
"The problems started almost immediately. We could all figure out the trash part pretty easily. But then we had to learn what was actually recyclable and what should be considered trash; and who could remember what went with what? Some plastic was considered trash and some was to be recycled. Who knew? It all looked like plastic to me. Some glass went with certain plastics but not with all plastics. Did the lids from the jars stay with the glass or did they go with the metal? Some junk mail was considered trash and some we needed to recycle. I was instructed that if it was printed in red ink we were not to recycle it. Why? Wasn’t it all paper? And aluminum foil; don’t even ask about the foil. It seems that I was supposed to wash it off before it went into the recycle bin; otherwise it was too sticky and icky to recycle. Imagine, here I was washing my trash before dumping it! Didn’t I have better things to do? What had this monster done to my life?
"And then things turned ugly. Recycle Monster started picking through the trash, checking up on me. I would put a plastic container in the recycle bin. Recycle Monster would walk by and, not so subtly, he would remove the container and check the number printed on the bottom. We always knew when I had made a mistake because he would proclaim in his best Recycling Monster voice, 'Gotcha! What number is on this plastic package?' he would growl. I could tell he was displeased. 'Seven. Well, excuse me, but anything with a seven on it is trash. Do not, repeat, DO NOT, put it in with the recyclables. Gotcha!'
"To add insult to injury, the city kept changing the rules on us. They would issue new lists of what was and what was not recyclable almost every month. One month the plastic bags from the market were considered trash; the next month they were to be recycled. One month the trays that meat is packaged on were trash; the next month they were to go in the blue can. Recycle Monster was enjoying every minute of this confusion. What happened to the mild-mannered boy from Brooklyn who I married? He couldn’t remember where he put his car keys, but he could remember all of the constantly changing recycling rules. They must go in the same part of the male brain as sports scores.
"So how are things today at our house? Not like the good old days, but definitely less tense. Things are not as simple as they were before we resolved to commit to this recycling routine but they are better. Our going green attitude has not been easy for us to maintain, but we are trying. Recycling Monster and I have called a truce. I do the best I can to put everything in its correct bin and the Monster does his best not to let me know when I have made a mistake. If I goof, he just quietly puts the item in the right place... most of the time. Every once in a while a 'gotcha' will escape from his lips, but for the most part, he is a reformed monster," Barbara LoMonaco wrote.
From the book "Chicken Soup for the Soul: My Resolution" by Jack Canfield, Mark Victor Hansen, D’ette Corona and Barbara LoMonaco. Copyright 2008 by Chicken Soup for the Soul Publishing, LLC. Published by Chicken Soup for the Soul Publishing, LLC. Chicken Soup for the Soul is a registered trademark of Chicken Soup for the Soul Publishing, LLC. Reprinted by permission. All rights reserved.
Hope you enjoyed it as much as I did…
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Ollie is a local citizen concerned with the environment and helping others. A retired Air Force fighter and instructor pilot, he is a graduate of Leadership San Marcos and received his degrees at Texas State University where he worked on staff before totally retiring. For questions or comments, he invites you to call him at 512-353-7432. or email [email protected].
