Memories serve as self-care during a more difficult holiday season

Dear Readers, I’ve been ruminating on holiday magic lately, seeking solace from personal turmoil as I’m denied time with my boys. Rather than wallow, my self-care strategies have gotten me reminiscing about the cheeky grandeur of the Holiday Sl*t-Tacular show that I produced in 2021.

I wish I could go back and relive it again, but this time without all the sound equipment kerfluffles. If you missed this show, you really missed something special. ’Twas born from my Waxed and Vaxxed and Ready for Acts show that sprung up on Wednesday nights during the pandemic on Sean Patrick’s’ patio while we apprehensively began gathering with folks in outdoor spaces. I’d hosted a hilarious Halloween edition where performers dressed as celebrities and parodied their songs and stand-up. I was George Carlin, of course.

After all that festive fun, I decided to coordinate a grand year-end finale with a huge holiday talent show. Usually, Halloween is when people show off their allure with sexy costumes, but I figured, in keeping with the Waxed and Vaxxed brand, winter solstice would best be honored with a sultry extravaganza. The show’s slogan: ‘Tis the Season for the Sleazin’ donned posters featuring the image of my favorite New Orleans queen, Eureeka Starfish, in her sexiest grinchy-whoville look.

The big event was to take place on the newly-built stage in the Irish pub’s “garden,” but as fate would have it, thunderstorms foiled our plan. At the last minute, a business owner in downtown Martindale donated the most wonderful event hall for the show which had all the feel of the community holiday performance from Schitt’s Creek.

The evening was spectacular! The pre-show entertainment included the sensual voice of singer-songwriter Cameron Elise as well as holiday rockabilly from The Caroling Brunettes, making their debut performance. With drag numbers by Mariah Carey (Jinx Minx) and Marilyn Monroe (Nix Nova) who sang Happy Birthday to Jesus (Michael Nieto) after he engaged in a roast battle with unapologetically corporate-sponsored Santa (Molly Hayes), the magical night also included original music and a strip-tease from Rudolph (Unsurpassed Profit), a Grinchy guitar duet (Captain MAZing and Dan Praver), and a candy cane burlesque number from Frankie Blackheart. The “Cafe Girls” from Café on the Square performed the “Mean Girls” holiday dance number, and the most inspiring moment of the night was when the sound utterly failed for burlesque performer, Annie Envy, who was dressed as an actual Christmas tree. The audience resorted to a capella singing of “We wish you a Merry Christmas” as she unwrapped her gifts for us, and it was a truly “sl*t-tacular” spectacle that I’ll cherish forever.

A brand new vintage shop was soft-opening next door to our venue, and the owner stayed open late, hoping to catch excited patrons as they exited our show. Reeling from his performance with his new band, Keith Clark spotted a Santa suit on a mannequin and expressed how he’d always wanted one. “Put it on!” the shop owner insisted, and it was a perfect fit! “Keep it!” she asserted, and from that day forward, Keith magically became Santa Claus. *glitter emoji* It was a night of losing sound, removing inhibitions and gaining lifetime memories. Our artistic community from the 78666 is the gift I’m celebrating this Christmas, and I hope you, too, are creating or reflecting on memories that allow you to savor the magic of Christmas, whether from the present, past or future. G*d bless us, Everyone! Xoxo,