Remember often forgotten victims

PATRICIA PLATERO LMSW HAYS-CALDWELL WOMEN'S CENTER

The following article is the third installment of a fourpart series focusing on raising awareness about domestic violence. October is Domestic Violence Awareness month.

We hope to educate our community on this very important issue. In our communities, the Hays-Caldwell Women’s Center has been serving victims of domestic and dating violence, sexual assault, and child abuse since 1978.

While primarily seen as last year's data, HCWC served 2,269 victims of abuse [face-to-face] primarily from Hays and Caldwell Counties. 978 of those were victims of domestic violence and 82 were male.

Domestic violence can happen to anyone regardless of age, gender, culture, religion, sexual identity, or socioeconomic background.

Historically women have been the most recognized victims or survivors of domestic violence, but approximately one in seven men will experience intimate partner violence in their life compared to one in four women [www.thehotline. org].

Domestic violence is not just physical abuse. It also includes other forms of abuse such as: Financial Abuse/ Controlling finances or restricting access to finances.

Emotional/Psychological (name calling, gas lighting, etc.) This can look like emasculation for a male victim or withholding affection.

Sexual coercion. Similar to a female victim this can be used as a way to control the other person.

The abuser, regardless of gender, uses this imbalance of power and control to intimidate, coerce, and manipulate their partner. Male and female victims of domestic violence have more in common than not.

So why do men not report or seek services? There is societal expectation that men are to be strong, stoic and show little emotion.

Most men grow up thinking it is not OK to cry much less express their emotions for it makes them look weak.

Societal gender views make it difficult for male victims to admit they are victims of domestic violence and furthermore harder for them to seek out supportive services. Men often face challenges that are gender-specific when it comes to reaching out and accessing services.

With time and community education we hope to break free of this stigma and help people realize that domestic violence is an act of violence in intimate partner relationships regardless of gender.

HCWC provides services, including shelter, to those in our community that have experienced domestic violence regardless of gender.

If you need shelter, support, or resources due to domestic violence, please call our 24-hour HELPline at 512-396-4357 to talk to our advocates, all of whom are specially trained and educated to help you navigate abusive situations, both before and after leaving.

To learn more ways to get involved with HCWC visit our website, www.hcwc.org for opportunities to volunteer, donate or get information on services.